One Thousand Scents

Friday, August 09, 2013

The Naked Truth: Biblioteca de Babel by Fueguia 1833 (with a brief deviation to talk about smut)

Almost two years ago (how time flies) I mentioned that I had received an e-mail from Google AdSense letting me know that the tiny ads I had allowed them to place at the top of my blog had accrued $100 worth of clicks, and could they have my banking information so they could deposit that money in my account? And I (ever suspicious when someone wants my banking information) said no, just cut me a cheque, please.

I never followed up on it in my blog, but they did in fact send me a cheque for $100. My grand money-making scheme had paid off! To the tune of approximately $2 a month!

Recently I received another e-mail from Google AdSense telling me, in effect, "You've got a dirty mind and you're cut off."

I instantly knew which blog posting they were talking about: my review of YSL M7, which featured this ad:


Imagine: showing an internationally published fragrance ad on a fragrance blog! How dare I!

These are the terms that I had violated (and which violation it took Google five and a half years to discover):

Google ads may not be placed on adult or mature content. This includes any site which contains:

full nudity
pornographic images, videos, or games
pornographic cartoons or anime (hentai/ecchi)

For more information about keeping your content family-safe, please review our program guidelines and these tips from the policy team.

"Full nudity". That presumably means "no pee-pees", and possibly "no exposed tids* on the ladies". Because a naked human being is PORNOGRAPHIC and NOT FAMILY-SAFE because FAMILIES DON'T HAVE PEE-PEES AND TIDS and DON'T YOU EVER FORGET IT.

But all is not lost!

[W]e suggest that you take the time to review the rest of your sites to ensure that they’re in compliance with our policies, and to monitor your sites accordingly to reduce the likelihood of future policy emails from us.

Fat chance of that happening. And just to make sure:


The Dying Gaul, aka The Dying Shameless Naked Guy


and here's a callipygian view because why not,


and some equally shameless old dude,


and to keep it modern the uncommonly beautiful model Andy Honda


and for good measure a lady.

That ought to do it.

+

I couldn't have been clearer that I was losing my patience with Fueguia 1833, which consists of far too many scents far too quickly composed and rushed to market: you can't launch eighteen decent scents all at once, but surely you can make six good ones or two great ones and the economies of scale be damned (unless you're not interested in art but in commerce, and the mere fact that I even suggest art might be involved shows how naïve I am). The fact is that most of them are rubbish. To find two that I loved, Mbucuruya and Xocoatl, out of eighteen was par for the course; to find a third is a surprise and a pleasure.

Biblioteca de Babel is unexpectedly complex: a gentle whoosh of thick tuberose, deliciously sweet dates, a faint breath of spice, a few curls of blonde tobacco, a large quantity of multifaceted wood. It isn't gendered at all: it's its own thing, and you wouldn't mind smelling it on anyone, any time, anywhere. It lacks greatness because isn't a classically structured fragrance: it doesn't develop at all, and all the elements are just kind of sitting there. But they're so attractive and so perfectly balanced that they can sit there all day and never wear out their welcome.

Oh, this stuff is glorious. I want a full bottle of it.

* A friend once told me the story of the young daughter of a friend of hers who heard the word "tits", misconstrued it as "tids", and called them that ever after. And really, isn't "tids" sweet and charming in a way that "tits" can never be?

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3 Comments:

  • This line has flown under my radar, but your post is too funny!
    We live in a sort of hypocritical society don't we?..:)
    That dying gaul is gorgeous.

    Lavanya

    By OpenID purplepaperplanes, at 11:25 PM  

  • DESPERATELY hypocritical. Artistic and fictional depictions of sexuality are just about the worst thing imaginable — they stain the participants forever — while parallel depictions of violence are given a free pass. If instead of putting that picture of the naked model in my review I had put a picture of a clothed man being decapitated, this wouldn't even be happening.

    The Dying Gaul is gorgeous in both senses: it's a beautiful, evocative piece of sculpture, and the man it depicts is an unimprovable exemplar of male beauty.

    By Blogger pyramus, at 9:21 AM  

  • Can you post where one can purchase this fragrance?
    Biblioteca de Babel

    By Blogger Real Factchecker, at 10:15 AM  

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